Seclusion

Last night I was awoken by a deep and terrible rumble. Trepidation and anxiety began to flow into every pore and opening on my body, filling my insides with horror and apprehension. I tried to open my eyes to see where I was and to try to remember how I had gotten there but against my persistent efforts my eyes remained shut. I then tried to move my toes, my fingers, my arms, and my legs but to no avail. I was paralyzed by fear itself, trapped inside of this strange and unusual place. Alone and vulnerable completely vulnerable. My eyes began to feel the dreaded sting of tears, as each tear blossomed from it's bud my closed eyes began to swell. While my eyes bulged my mouth slowly opened. I took in a quick sip of air and tried to use the little energy I had conjured up to let out a cry for help. Yet, as I began to scream, I heard nothing but the deafening ring of silence. I was trapped alone with my fears, my worries, but worst of all with myself, my greatest enemy of all.

Addicted

While I lie alone on the cold went floor.

My body aches for just a little bit more.

This is the lie I continuously tell.

Ever since my soul began to sell.

There was a time when I didn't always fail.

Before I heard the Siren's wail.

Before I began to self destruct.

Before temptation became, "You must."

Yet now I have fallen so deep in my mind

That my true self I can't seem to find.

I am controlled by something dark, unreal.

And forced to feel what I don't want to feel.

Perhaps this is the way things are supposed to be.

Perhaps this is why I still refuse to flee.

I was betrayed with a kiss by demons in disguise.

These despicable creatures spoon fed me lies.

I can not tell you what the future may hold.

But I am tired of being tricked and cajoled.

My story isn't over, I'll continue to write.

I will not surrender until I win this fight.

If you got visions of the past let them follow you down for they'll come back to you someday.

Cause lately I've been tired and uninspired.

I don't know what I feel anymore.

I am repulsive.

Am I really so consumed in my own problems that I don't even have the ability to listen to others and help them anymore?

Am I useless?

Is there any point to my existent?

Am I selfish?

Is it hard to spend time with me?

Who am I?

What is the point?

Is she right?

Time

The time is cold,

Yet nimble and quick.

Never growing old

Ready to trick.

Our young, naive souls

With time, try to mingle.

Time’s voice is silent,

No joyous jingle.

Leaves one bent

Figuring out why.

Time’s mask is dull.

Time whispers lies.

Pretends to lull

Then rushes by.

Leaving you behind.

Leaving you to die.

Yet still with our twisted mind’s

We try to control the powerful time.

Our hands try to grasp while our eyes try to find.

Our ears seek out some imaginary chime.

But as we search for the forever lost

Time squirms and giggles endlessly.

Once again we’ve been tripped and tossed.

Time leaves us behind, broken, skipping away merrily.

My mother hid the the wine.

My mother fucking hid the wine.

A humming bird flew up beside me and whispered a secret into my ear, "Your life is a lie, speak and live the truth" I then replied, "But why must I do this if the truth hurts so much?" The little bird responded in a rush, "If the world was simply honest and had a bit of trust perhaps confusion would lessen and there wouldn't be such a fuss. A search for the truth is what we all possess, and when the truth is broken mishap will process. Stand up, open your eyes, and breathe the truth. For the world will be less broken if the chain of lies ends with you."

Secrets

A stain on your soul, some may say.

A burden you hold that you must also lay.

The monster that feeds on all your insides.

The monster that forces you to run and hide.

You feel the burn of a label upon your heart.

You feel the pain of hate like piercing darts.

Unable to breathe from the force of a wave.

A wave invisible to others, you can never be saved.

Though the power is within you to find your help.

But the hand of fear silences your yelps.

Screaming and curling alone does no good.

Bleeding and wailing doesn’t fix what it should.

Slowly but surely your mind is engulfed.

It possesses you, and your spirit it tries to dissolve.

You flaunt and you grin, act like everything is alright.

Those who wish to be blind will never see your fight.

Still others will see and know not what to do.

While you wonder alone in a maze of you.

Yet you hold on to that power which you wish you never met.

You clutch and hold securely your dear secrets.